BRIAN TIBBETTS: Accidental Salesman + Never Been Beat at Scrabble + Unintentionally Drove the Getaway Car for an Armed Robbery at 16

CARLOS KOTKIN: Author of PLEASE GOD LET IT BE HERPES (Penguin, March 2012) + Winner of Multiple MOTH StorySLAMs + Featured Essayist on KCRW’s UNFICTIONAL + Swam with Sharks in Bora Bora + Attended Prom Twice, 10 Years Apart

CHERYL STRAYED: Gives Life & Love Advice as DEAR SUGAR on therumpus.net + NY Times Best-Selling Author of the memoir WILD (Knopf, March 2012, screen rights purchased by Reese Witherspoon) + At 14 she performed in a waterski show on a Minnesota lake called Minnewawa with a guy named Quaalude

JOHN RODERICK: Lead Singer/Guitarist in the Band THE LONG WINTERS + Worked as a Sluice Box Mucker for a Gold Mine + Voted Seattle’s 3rd Sexiest Man in 2003

LAURA GIBSON: Folk singer & songwriter + Worked With Colin Meloy, Rachel Blumberg, Laura Viers, and THE PORTLAND CELLO PROJECT + Currently Touring Her Newest Record, LA GRANDE + Can recite the abbreviations for the first 36 elements in the periodic table

NATHALIE WEINSTEIN: Editor of PDX PIPELINE + 2011 Oregon Newspaper Publishers Association Award, 2nd Place for Lifestyle Reporting + Back Fence PDX House Manager + Lover of All Things Kitty Cat

ADAM ARNOLD: Local Fashion Designer Icon + Collects Marmalade + Is an INFJ + Owns all of the Original ‘Hawaii Five-O’ | watch

BETH LISICK: Lead in the Award-Winning Feature Film: ‘Everything Strange and New’ + NY Times Best-Selling Author + ‘Yokohama Threeway’ (Michelle Tea’s City Lights imprint) | watch

DAYVID FIGLER: Became One of the Youngest Lawyers in Nevada History (at 23 yrs. old) + Commentator on ‘The Nancy Grace Show’ | watch

MATT SMITH: World Class Benefit Auctioneer + Longtime Newspaper Boy + Creator of Critically Acclaimed One Man Shows ‘All My Children’ & ‘My Last Year with the Nuns’

JEFF HARDISON: Currently Building ‘Meridian’, a Mobile-App Startup + Kentucky Born and Raised + Post-College, Supported Himself Winning Foosball Tournaments for Cash Prizes | watch

LAUREN WEEDMAN: ‘The Daily Show’ Correspondent + Actor, Writer for HBO’s ‘Hung’ + Creator of Critically Acclaimed One Woman Shows ‘Bust’ & ‘No, You Shut Up’ | watch

AMBER JO: Radical Social Worker + Undefeated Leg Wrestler in 4 States + Former Gambler + Featured Mortified Performer | watch

ARTHUR BRADFORD: Director ‘Six Days to Air: The Making of South Park’ + ‘Benny’s Brigade’ (McSweeney’s) + Co-Director for Camp Jabberwocky + Writer, Director, Producer of MTV’s ‘How’s Your News?’ | watch

BETH LISICK: Lead in the Award-Winning Feature Film: ‘Everything Strange and New’ + NY Times Best-Selling Author + ‘Yokohama Threeway’ (Michelle Tea’s City Lights imprint) | watch

BRIDGET PILLOUD: Pet Psychic + Intuitive Counselor + Athlete Wannabe

ERIC SCHEUR: Freelance Animator + Karaoke Junkie + Collector of 1980’s Pocket Games + Ira Glass Wannabe | watch

LAUREN WEEDMAN: ‘The Daily Show’ Correspondent + Actor, Writer for HBO’s ‘Hung’ + Creator of Critically Acclaimed One Woman Shows ‘Bust’ & ‘No, You Shut Up’

CARLI DAVIDSON: Animal Obsessed Photographer + Pork Addict + NRA member | watch

DAVID SILVERMAN: World Class Benefit Auctioneer + Ate 18 Donuts and Still Lost the Eating Contest | watch

DOUG ASKELSON: Construction Estimator + Professional Pain in the Ass | watch

GREGG ABBOTT: Whiffies Pie Owner + Huge Ukulele Nerd Who Once Ate 75 Scoops of Ice Cream in 3 Days for Research | watch

LAURIE NOTARO: New York Times Best-Selling Author + Bigfoot Enthusiast | watch

MARY VAN NOTE: Weird Standup Comedienne + Specializes in Drawing Stick Figures | watch

AMBER JO: Radical Social Worker + Undefeated Leg Wrestler in 4 States | watch

DARIA ELIUK: KRSK “the Buzz” (105.1 FM) + Once a Summer Camp Counselor | watch

DERRICK BROWN: Former Paratrooper + Write Bloody Publishing | watch

FIONA MCCANN: Born in Dublin + Lived in Japan, Argentina, and Cape Cod | watch

SHELLEY MCLENDON & WENDI MCLENDON-COVEY (telling a story in tandem!): Roadhouse: The Play! + Once an Awesome McMenamins Waitress; Bridesmaids + Reno 911 + Hillshire Farms Sausage Spokesperson | watch

EGAN DANEHY: Host/Producer of Mortified PDX + Changer of Diapers | watch

MATT SMITH: World Class Auctioneer + The Postman in Sleepless in Seattle | watch

MEG WORDEN: Former Federal Prisoner + Current Nutrition Coach and Yoga Teacher | watch

PRISCILLA G. ROBINSON: Former Forensic Military Photographer/Photojournalist + Current Fragrance Salesperson

SARAH GRACE MCCANDLESS: Author of The Girl I Wanted to Be + Cupcake Eater | watch

SAURABH TAK: Born and Raised in India + Current New Yorker + Moth StorySLAM Winner | watch

KERRY COHEN: Psychotherapist + Author of Loose Girl | watch

BRUCE OBERG: Co-Founder of Sucker Punch, makers of the INFAMOUS + SLY COOPER Playstation games

LUCINDA JANE HOLSCHER: 12-Year-Old Drummer from Rock ‘N’ Roll Camp for Girls | watch

JIMMY RADOSTA: Mortified Favorite + Super fan of Bob Barker and Andy Rooney | watch

BOB MCCOY: Forest Park Park Ranger + Lapsed Quaker | watch

DALE CHUMBLEY: Realtor + 5th Generation Vancouverite | watch

A WOLFE: Snap Judgement + Sketch Comedy Duo: Just Desperation | watch

ERIC SCHEUR: Animator for TV Commercials | watch

LAUREN WEEDMAN: HBO’s Hung + The Daily Show | watch

MOE BOWSTERN: Fisherwoman + Former anarcho-activist | watch

ROD ENGLERT: Blood Spatter Expert + Author of Blood Secrets | watch

ZACHARY SCHOMBURG: Scary, No Scary + Octopus Books | watch

ANDREW DICKSON: Filmmaker + Wieden Kennedy

COURTENAY HAMEISTER: Host of Live Wire! radio + Screenwriter

JENNIFER LAUCK: Author of Blackbird + Found

JOAN HILLER: Stellar Painter + Riot Act Media

KYLE HUMPHREY: Song and Dance Man + Poopsmith

TRES SHANNON: Voodoo Doughnuts + Karaoke From Hell

ARTHUR BRADFORD: Dogwalker: Stories + MTV’s How’s Your News | watch

CHASE REEVES: Father Apprentice | watch

LAUREN WEEDMAN: HBO’s Hung + The Daily Show | watch

MARLENE TURNER: Trinidadian Baby Nurse | watch

MATTHEW BALDWIN: Peace Corps Volunteer + Defective Yeti | watch

TAYLOR CASS STEVENSON: Green Burial Assistant

BEN Z SAMPLES: Professional Eavesdropper

CHRIS THOMPSON: Personal Assistant for a Famous Romance Novelist

KATRINA SCOTTO DI CARLO: Co-Creator of Supportland

MOLLY NORTON: Friend of Bob Barker

RICHARD LEFEVBRE: Hot Rod Builder + Filmmaker

ADAM ARNOLD: Fashion Designer | watch

ALEXIS REHRMANN: Web Editor Portland Monthly | watch

CAMI KAOS: Strange Love Live Host | watch

JOHANNA STEIN: Writer, Comedienne

PAULS TOUTONGHI: Pushcart Prize Winner | watch

PETER AMES CARLIN: Biographer of Rock Stars | watch

GINA GLOVER & SEAN GUNN: Box Dancer at the Standard Hotel & Kirk from the Gilmore Girls

GREG GASPERIN & DIANE GASPERIN: Cat Enthusiast & Sex Researcher

NICOLE J. GEORGES & K. DAVIDSON: Graphic Novelist, Pet Portrait Artist & Famous Singer/Songwriter & Lesbian Professional

COLE GAMBLE: Burt Reynolds’s Personal Assistant | watch

DOUG LYON: Medical Director of Mercy Corps

JILLIAN LAUREN: Harem Girl

SEAN MCGRATH: Dalton from Road House: The Play

STEVE ALMOND: Author of Rock n Roll will Save Your Life

SUNNY PARKER: Corrections Officer

ARTHUR BRADFORD: MTV Producer and Director, How’s Your News

DAVE WILLIAMS: Portland Actor | watch

HEATHER DAWN PARK: Riverboat Casino Dealer

LAURA FAYE SMITH: Voice over Actor, Star of The Receptionist

MATT PELLEGRIN: Lifelong Wheel of Fortune Fan | watch

MEAGAN KATE: Love in the Dump Chute Co-host, Intern Extraordinaire

SARAH MIRK: Cyclist, Portland Mercury News Reporter

EMILY RICHMOND: Las Vegas Journalist + Nice (enough) Jewish girl | watch

FATBOY ROBERTS: Recovering Radio Personality

FOGATRON: Vocal Synthesizer and Beat Box Mastermind | watch

KAROL COLLYMORE: Political Blogger

RILEY MICHAEL PARKER: Visual Artist and Talk Show Host | watch

RORY MILLER: Thug Wrangler + Former Corrections Officer

SCOTT KRAVITZ: Annie Award Winning Animator | watch

AARON WALKER: Reluctant Systems Engineer | watch

BRIDGET PILLOUD: Intuitive Counselor

ELI HIRSCH: 14-year-old Musician + Actor + Producer | watch

ERIC REID: Director of Soap St. Theater | watch

MATT SMITH: World-Class Auctioneer

NATHANIEL BOGGESS: DJ Teenage and Author | watch

STACY BOLT: Deadbeat Blogger | watch

ERIC SCHNIEWIND: Geologist | watch

JAMI CURL: Owner + Saint Cupcake | watch

JEFF HARDISON: Preacher’s Grandson

NICOLE GEORGES: Comic Artist, Advice Columnist | watch

PEMA TEETER: Playwright

RAEL DORNFEST: Twitter UX engineer

VIVA LAS VEGAS: Stripper + Author | watch

ANDREW MONKO: Entertainment Specialist | watch

DAVE WEICH: Powell’s Marketing Director | watch

DAYVID FIGLER: NPR Essayist | watch

MIC CRENSHAW: Writer + Journalist and Success Coach | watch

NATE ANGELL: Open-Source Evangelist | watch

SHELLEY MCLENDON: Performer with The Liberators | watch

TARA DUBLIN: DJ for 94.7 | watch

ANIS MOJGANI: Slam Poet Who Has Appeared on HBO and NPR

BRAD FORTIER: Education Director at The Brody Theater

EZRA CARAEFF: The Music Editor + Portland Mercury

HEATHER STRANG: Writer + Journalist and Success Coach

JEFF BAKER: From The Oregonian

JORDI BARNES: Writer, Performer With The 3rd Floor

VANESSA VESELKA: Musician and Writer

ADAM SHEARER: Weinland Band Member

ALEX JAMES: Dolorean Band Member

DANNY SEIM: Menomena Band Member

GIDEON FREUDMANN: Musician, Member of Portland Cello Project

JOAN HILLER: Riot Act Media

LISA MARSICEK: Miz Kitty + Flat Mountain Girls Band Member

NICK JAINA: Musician

BETH LISICK: Writer + Porchlight Storytelling series Founder

DAVE JARECKI: Writer + Breakerboy Communications Founder

DAVID BRAGDON: Metro President

SADIE MEDLEY: Freelance Designer + Aspiring Voice Over Artist

SARAH GILBERT: Writer + Blogger + Cafe Mama

SLIM MOON: Founder of Record Label Kill Rock Stars

TINA NEWTON: Owner + Blue Moon Fiber Arts

ADAM ARNOLD: Fashion Designer | watch

ADRIENNE FLAGG: Actress + Creative Director for Interstate Firehouse Cultural Center | watch

FRANCES MILLER: Freelance Writer + Radical Feminist | watch

FRANK D’ANDREA: Short Story Writer + English Instructor | watch

MATT DAVIS: News Editor for the Portland Mercury

MATT EDLEN: Musician

REUBEN NISENFELD: Poet | watch

ALISON HALLETT: Arts Editor, Portland Mercury | watch

BECKY POOLE: Sketch comedian | watch

BRIAN BELEFANT: Commerical TV Director + Screenwriter | watch

CATHLEEN MULLINS: Former Scientologist | watch

ERIC REID: Actor + Landscaper | watch

JORDI BARNES: Member of The 3rd Floor + Olivia Newton John fan | watch

KIALA: Freelance Writer + Blogger | watch